Thursday, November 11, 2010

Latangela Newsome - watch for her in a movie soon

Latangela Newsome just left a few days ago to go back to Florida. While
here in California she was picked up for a film project. Also, the manager
put her in an exercise program that wore her out. She had to run up
a mountain, up several flights of stairs and lift bar bells. Now, you
know how tiny she is. However, she did it. Over a month of vigorous
training. Keep your eyes open for the movie. I have to say this, do
you think they were preparing her to PLAY SUPERMAN.

Latangela Newsome - watch for her in a movie soon

Latangela Newsome just left a few days ago to go back to Florida. While
here in California she was picked up for a film project. Also, the manager
put her in an exercise program that wore her out. She had to run up
a mountain, up several flights of stairs and lift bar bells. Now, you
know how tiny she is. However, she did it. Over a month of vigorous
training. Keep your eyes open for the movie. I have to say this, do
you think they were preparing her to PLAY SUPERMAN.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

TOILET LADY TIDBITS - Bush called a racist by Kanye West

TOILET LADY SAID: I read yesterday that George W. Bush said being
called racist by Kanye West regarding the
KATRINA flooding represented an all time
low for him. Kanye said Bush didn't care
about Black people.

WACKY GRANNY: Now! (giggle) I don't believe Kanye West
can see STRAIGHT NOR think straight.

Come on - think! All the talk in the black
communities and tabloids about Condaleeza

Rice and GEORGE W. BUSH. Most Black females
were saying "I know that look Ms. Rice
gives Bush. Even the tabloids put that

look she gives him on the front page for
eveybody to see.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

TOILET LADY TIDBITS - YOUNG GIRL TELLS ME SHE IS INTERESTED

TOILET LADY TALKING TO WACKY GRANNY




I WAS WORKING IN THE TOILET ROOM CLUB LAST NIGHT AND

THIS YOUNG GIRL COMES IN AND ASKS ME FOR GUM. I GAVE

HER THE GUM AND SHE KISSED ME ON THE SIDE OF MY

CHEEK. THEN SHE KISSED ME AGAIN AND SAID YOU ARE

BEAUTIFUL. THEN SHE KISSED ME AGAIN. THEN SHE

SAID:

YOUNG GIRL: I really like you. You are so nice.

TOILET LADY; WELL! THANK YOU. SO ARE YOU.

YOUNG GIRL; YOU ARE SO NICE.

THEN SOMEONE IN THE TOILET ROOM WHO WAS A FRIEND OF

THIS YOUNG GIRL THAT WAS KISSING ME SAID. SHE's GAY AND

SHE REALLY LIKES YOU.

YOUNG GIRL; YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL.

TOILET LADY; (BEWILDERED AND UNCOMFORTABLE) WELL!

I THINK I HAD BETTER GO AND CLEAN

THAT TOILET (WALKS AWAY AND THE

YOUNG GIRL COMES UP BEHIND HER)

YOUNG GIRL; WHAT TIME DO YOU GET OFF FROM WORK?

TOILET LADY; (UNCOMFORTABLE) SWEETIE, I'M NOT GAY.

YOUNG GIRL; YOU DON't HAVE TO BE.

TOILET LADY; WOW! (THINKING - here I am an ole lady

and being "hit on" by a pretty young

gay girl. She got to be on something

cause she keeps kissing ME on the side of

MY face. Toilet Lady looked her dead

in the face and she looked right back with

no shame and licked her lips.

TOILET LADY: (NERVOUS) I DON'T KNOW WHAT TIME I WILL GET

OFF.

YOUNG GIRL: I'LL WAIT.

TOILET LADY: (THINKING) THIS GIRL IS REALLY "OUT OF HER

TREE". SHE GOT TO BE ON SOME DRUG. SHE

GOT TO BE. IN HERE HITTING ON A GRANNY.

TALKING BOUT I"M BEAUTIFUL. SHE'll WAIT

FOR ME. TOILET LADY COMES OUT OF HER

STUPER WHEN SHE HEARS WACKY GRANNY'S

VOICE.

WACKY GRANNY: WELL! DID YOU FINALLY COME OUT OF THAT

LOCKED TOILET STALL.

TOILET LADY; YEAH! I FINALLY CAME OUT NERVOUS AS I

COULD BE. I AIN'T HAD THAT KIND OF

ATTENTION AND SO MUCH SINCE I WAS A

YOUNG LADY. I AIN'T NEVER BEEN GAY.

BUT, SHE KEPT KISSING ON THE SIDE OF

MY FACE.

WACKY GRANNY: SO! NOW, IN YOUR OLE AGE, YOU THINK

IT'S OK TO BE GAY WITH ALL THE ATTENTION.

SHE MUST HAVE BEEN SO DRUNK THAT SHE

COULD NOT SEE ALL THAT FLAB ON YOU THAT

FLOPS AROUND WHEN YOU WALK.

TOILET LADY: (GIVES A HARD LOOK AT WACKY GRANNY)

PLEASE NOTICE I LOST SOME WEIGHT.




NOTICE TO TILLIE: TELL ALL YOUR FRIENDS AND RELATIVES

TO WATCH THE WACKY GRANNY SHOW, PART I

AND PART II.

ALSO LOOK AT THE GRANNY RAP AND RANT.

THIS GRANNY IS SO GOOD WITH HER RHYMING.

I LOVE THIS GRANNY WHEN SHE SAYS "WHAT

IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD TODAY? I'M

AN OLD LADY BUT I'SM NOT CRAZY."

Friday, August 13, 2010

TOILET LADY TIDBITS - Female is fired for sexual harassment

KNOCK AT THE DOOR. WACKY GRANNY YELLS COME IN.

TOILET LADY ENTERS WITH A BIG SMILE ON HER FACE.

Wacky Granny: Hi! What you smiling about, TODAY?

TOILET LADY: I'M LAUGHING because a lady came in to

use the toilet last night. She was an

older female.

WACKY GRANNY: Did she feed you some good "juice"?

TOILET LADY: WELL! I AM STILL LAUGHING!

WACKY GRANNY: What "juice" did this one feed you?

TOILET LADY: I woke up laughing. I don't think she

is wrapped too tight.

WACKY GRANNY: Go on!

TOILET LADY: THIS LADY lost her job for sexual harassment.

WACKY GRANNY: WHO DID SHE SEXUALLY HARASSMENT?

TOILET LADY: FIRST, you must see what she looks like.

WACKY GRANNY: SHE WAS A LOOKER, HUH?

TOILET LADY: You tell me if this is a "looker"? SHE IS
ABOUT 6 ft 4 in. SHE HAS MORE BONES THAN
POPEYE'S girlfriend. SHE HAS DISHWATER
BLOND HAIR WITH A RING IN HER NOSE. Not to
say nothing about the nose.

WACKY GRANNY; How did she lose her job?

TOILET LADY: Well! She had been on the job 15 years. She
gave her boss a note that said "I'll do you -
Let me hit you with the moment".

WACKY GRANNY: Why would she do something so dumb ........
where they can trace a note. Why didn't she
just walk up to him and say "Let me hit you with
the moment".

TOILET LADY: I told you she was not wrapped, too, tight.

WACKY GRANNY: YEAH! Having evidence is not good.

TOILET LADY; The boss gave the note back to her. She said
she did not want to be assigned to this particu-
lar job anymore that no one wanted to do. She
said a couple of co-workers told her that they
"do the boss" so they won't be assigned to that
task that no one wants.

WACKY GRANNY: So, she wrote him a "I'll do you" note.

TOILET LADY: EXACTLY! But, let me tell you how much dumbmer

she was. She was dumbmer than dumb. His boss
asked her about the "SEXUAL HARASSMENT". She
SAID THAT SHE DID NOT SEXUALLY harass her boss,
that she just gave him a note.


WACKY GRANNY: So, she gave them the note.

TOILET LADY: Back up a little! When they asked her to let them
see the note that she passed to her boss, She
told them that she did not have it here on the
job. The note was at home.

WACKY GRANNY: Then how did she get FIRED?

TOILET LADY: THEY asked her to bring in the note so they can
see it.

WACKY GRANNY: NAW! don't tell me that she was dumb enough
to go home and get the note and bring it
back to his boss.

TOILET LADY: I told you she was dumbmer than dumb.

WACKY GRANNY: The way I look at it, she deserved to lose that
job after 15 years. SHE BROUGHT IN THE NOTE.
That was dumb.

TOILET LADY: When she brought in the note for them to read
......that is when she was immediately fired.

WACKY GRANNY: About how old was this lady?

TOILET LADY: About 47 and bony.

WACKY GRANNY: Why do you think he would not let her "Hit
him with the moment"? Especially, if the
other workers were "hitting him".


TOILET LADY: Personally, I believe it was those bones.
And, the note made him realize that she
was DUMBMER THAN DUMB.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

TOILET LADY TIDBITS - Youth facing rejection from boyfriend

Wacky Granny: You look tired and worn out. Plop your lovely,
heavy behind down at the kitchen table. Don't sit
on the one with the wobbly leg. It might let you
crash to the floor. (Toilet Lady sits down with
a sigh and a thud and starts running her mouth.


Toilet Lady: Chil....these youngins talk and cry about anything.
Last night made me cry and jump into ACTION. Youth just
cant't deal with REJECTION especially from a boyfriend.


Wacky Granny: ....go on...!

Toilet Lady: Two girls came in crying like their dog just died out there

in the club on the dance floor....(pause)

Wacky Granny: Go on!

Toilet Lady: I said: What is making you girls cry as if it is the end
of the world for you. WHAT DID I SAY THAT FOR?
The tears really started raining like it was a
thunderstorm. I figured I had better start doing
somehing to slow down the water or I was going to
have to start bailing water. I started passing
out tissue to soak up the excess.


Sadie: (first girl, sniffling and wiping snot. ) My boyfriend
just dumped me....

Kim: (second girl) Mine....too! They are friends and they
said...they are looking for...(pause)...they are
out there sitting at a table (she points and starts
crying harder).



Sadie: They dumped us! For no reason. They just said they were
not interested in staying in the relationship. I loved
him. I just loved him. I still love him...cause...
I will love him forever.

Toilet Lady: (puzzled).....and that is why you are cryin like you
will "never see the light of day" again.


Sadie: My boyfriend has a little bitty penis, but I loved him
anyway. I loved him so much. I can't stop cryin
cause I love him.



Toilet Lady: Well! Good for you. When I was young....a long time
ago...sex was not everything. It was about who
loved you and wanted to marry you.



Kim: I loved my boyfriend, too. We have been together more
than a year (crying and unable to talk anymore).

Toilet Lady: You both are too attractive to be crying about being
DUMPED. One thing that we never learn is how to deal
with REJECTION. Rejection ain't that bad. It only
means you will find something better.

Sadie: I love him .........very much. I don't want to be
apart from him. I don't want him to break up with
me.

Toilet Lady: Well. LOOKS like you are going to be apart. Now you
start dealing with it. When someone lets you know
they don't want you, you accept that and move on. You don't
waste all yo life trying to convince them to take you
back and give you another chance.....pleeeeeeease.

Kim: It's very, very, very, very hard! I will die without
him.


Toilet Lady: It won't KILL you to die. You will survive.
It may be hard at first but you will slide

thru it. RIGHT! NOW, DRY YO EYES. Tidy up yo
face. Make it look new.

You are going to go back out there with a big smile
on yo face. You switch out there in the club and
make all eyes on you. Switch with a LOT OF CONFIDENCE
when you walk. Remember to keep the BIG smile on
yo face.

Sadie: OK! I get what you are saying. It is registerng.

Toilet Lady: Let me show you how to walk with confidence and
switch - remember to keep smiling. (Toilet
Lady starts prancing across the toilet room floor,
with a sexy switch and smile on her face. (Toilet
Lady repeats the sexy walk several times to make
sure they get the point).


Kim: Ok! I have to remember to keep the smile going while I walk
with confidence and switch.

Sadie: I have to hold my head up like I am desirable. At
your age and as big as you are I can look sexy like
you slinking across the toilet room floor with a
smile and the mop.

Toilet Lady: The smile is everything. Keep it on your face.
Make yoself inviting.

Kim: I have to wash my face and comb my hair.



Toilet Lady: Go right ahead. Start smiling right now. LIGHT UP YO
face with a smile. And....hold your head up like you
know you got it goin on.

Kim: I feel better already. I don't love him anymore. I
will get tangled with someone that wants me....too.

Toilet Lady: That--a girl!

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